Growing Gratitude from the Inside Out
In a world dominated by external stimuli and material pursuits, finding true gratitude within ourselves can be a transformative journey. While external sources of gratitude certainly have their place, the key to lasting contentment lies in connecting deeply, with integrity, to the core of our hearts~ with the essence of who and what we really are. This blog post explores the art of turning inward to foster a sense of appreciation that goes beyond external circumstances.
Understanding External vs. Internal Gratitude:
External gratitude often revolves around other people, material possessions, achievements, or positive experiences. While these are valid sources of appreciation, they can be transient. What happens, for example, when the person that you have tied all your gratitude and gratitude practices to is no longer in your life? Or you lose the job you’ve been endlessly grateful for?
There’s nothing wrong with being grateful for these external contributors to our life. In fact, the gratitude we feel and communicate around them, often creates more of the same sorts of beautiful aspects of life. That said, when these aspects are impacted by any sort of shift or change, we leave our lives (our hearts!) in a position that feels additionally challenging as we must now manage the grief of losing this person, opportunity or item AND find new sources of gratitude that will help us to soften the edges of our now, grief impacted lives.
Internal gratitude, on the other hand, is rooted in self-awareness and mindfulness. It involves recognizing and appreciating the intrinsic qualities and values that contribute to our well-being. Access to this sort of gratitude allows for post traumatic growth after loss experiences as it allows us to recognize aspects of life that we hold within our person, meaning that we have control over them and they cannot be taken away from us, the opposite of one of the key points of our grief~ loss and loss of control of outcome, however slowly, helping us to see a sliver of hope and the ability for us build anew.
Practical Steps to Grow Internal Gratitude:
Mindfulness Practices:
Engage in mindfulness activities such as meditation, deep breathing, or yoga. These practices create space for self-reflection and help develop a heightened awareness of our thoughts and emotions.
Gratitude Journaling:
Keep a gratitude journal to regularly document things you appreciate about yourself, your character, or your journey. Focusing on internal attributes fosters a deeper sense of gratitude. This doesnt have to be a big production. Start small with one gratitude item a day listed in either a single word or a short sentence.
Self-Compassion:
Treat yourself with the same kindness and understanding you would offer to a friend, a treasured pet or small child. Embrace self-compassion in times of difficulty, acknowledging your strengths and accepting your imperfections. Yes, I know this is easier said than done. This too, is a practice.
Personal Growth Goals:
Set realistic personal growth goals that align with your values. Working towards these goals provides a sense of purpose and accomplishment, fostering gratitude for your journey of self-improvement. This can be wonderful work in which to employ a personal coach for additional reflection points and accountability.
Connect with Inner Values:
Identify your core values and align your actions with them. Living in accordance with your values enhances a sense of purpose and fulfillment, leading to internal gratitude. Not sure where to start? This is another practical, approachable way “in” with a personal coach. I have a toolbox full of resources that could assist in creating fun and interesting ways for clients to identify their personal values and where they can create action in their lives to be in alignment with them.
Finding Gratitude in External Things:
While internal gratitude is paramount, appreciating external elements can complement the internal journey. External gratitude can be meaningful when:
Practicing Appreciation:
Acknowledge the positive aspects of external circumstances without relying on them for happiness. Recognize the role they play in your life while understanding that true contentment comes from within.
Expressing Gratitude:
Share your appreciation with others. Expressing gratitude for external elements can strengthen relationships and contribute to a positive, interconnected community.
Balancing internal and external gratitude is a delicate dance that requires self-awareness and mindfulness. By nurturing internal gratitude through self-reflection, self-compassion, and personal growth, we lay the foundation for a more meaningful and sustainable sense of appreciation. Remember, the journey within is as important as the external factors that contribute to our lives.